NBA Institutes Dress Code: Dress Whiter

NEW YORK - The National Basketball Association has instituted a dress code for players. Players will be required to wear "business casual" attire when participating in team or league activities. Players may still wear basketball uniforms during games, however.

"Basically, we're running a business here, and the players are employees," said NBA spokesperson Art Wise. "We expect them to comply with [the dress code]."

"Guys around the league don't like this at all," said NBA insider and Michael Jordan suck-up Ahmad Rashad. "These guys make it to the league, they make their money, they've got custom-made suits, hats, gold jewelry and whatnot, and they want to show it off," added Rashad. "And that's just the white players."

"These guys do NOT want to go into downtown Detroit looking like they are going door to door handing out copies of 'The Watchtower.'"

So just how does the NBA define "business casual?"

"Basically, our goal was to make the NBA more fan-friendly," said Wise. "And by that I mean, more rich-white-male-fan-friendly."

"In order to do that, we need to make the players look like the kind of people who could be on their lunch break from Sprint or someplace. Maybe kind of like what I'm wearing, Dockers khakis with a nice golf shirt," said Wise.

But Wise was also quick to point out that there is some flexibility in the dress code to allow for individual creativity and expression.

"We continue to support players' individuality by allowing them to wear up to three league-approved buttons. They can select from things like the league logo, the slogan 'I love this game!,' maybe a team insignia."

"We also plan to have a Hawaiian shirt day right after the All-Star break, which should be off the hook," added Wise.


Old NBA dress code.


New NBA dress code.